Unkind words and Gossip

In the innocence of childhood, I can remember repeating the phrase, "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me".  This was more than likely in response to someone saying something unkind.  It was a defense that I said and I heard others say too.   I can hear the snarky tone and feel the sarcasm.  Yet I can remember going home one afternoon in elementary school and crying to my mom because of a few unkind words that someone had said to me.  Even though the other child was "teasing" and did like me, the words stung.  And it made me question things about myself.  There have been other times in life when someone's words have pierced my heart.

A few weeks ago, I spent some time with a friend I hadn't seen in a while.  I enjoyed visiting with her.  It was nice to get caught up on what was happening in her life and share with her about my life too.  The conversation turned at some point and another person became the focus.  I found myself feeling uncomfortable.  I am confident the Holy Spirit was whispering to me that I shouldn't engage in gossip.  This was hard because I knew the other person had hurt my friend.  I listened and felt compassion toward her about the hurt she felt.  I tried to not say anything that felt "gossipy".  Eventually she was talking more about the other person and less about the hurt she felt.  I attempted to shift our conversation to other topics.  I am working on becoming more assertive and this was another challenge for me.  I am fairly certain there was more I could have or should have done.  It is nice to know that as I continue to seek His guidance, the Lord will provide.

I have turned many times lately to the book of Ephesians.  I really like it.  Chapter 4 is about Unity in the Body of Christ and Living as Children of Light.  It is full of words of wisdom and ways that we should speak and act as witnesses for Christ.  Paul starts out in verses 1 and 2 saying, "As a prisoner for the Lord, then, I urge you to live a life worthy of the calling you have received  Be completely humble and gentle: be patient, bearing with one another in love".

Verse 29 says "Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen".
Verse 31 reminds us "Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you".

There have been many times that I have spoke unkind words, often out of my own grumpiness or irritability, not intending to be mean.  There are times that I have been insensitive to others' thoughts and feelings.  There are times when I have yelled because things were out of my control and I felt angry.  There are times that I have gossiped too.

  As I have prayed for God to help me with all of these things, I came across a few other verses in reading that stand out to me.  "My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger" (James 1:19). And Matthew 15:18 "But the things that come out of the mouth,
 come from the heart".

  I continue to pray for transformation in my life and for God to create in me a pure heart. I want Him to write His story on my heart.  I pray for Him to interrupt my thoughts or speech if I am leaning toward gossip.  I ask Him to help me be humble, to be gentle in my thoughts, words and actions, and to be patient with others.  I have asked Him to help me only speak the truth in love and that what I say may be full of grace to all who hear my words.  I want to help build others up.  And as I have sought forgiveness, I also forgive others.  As a daughter of the King, I am confident that He will continue to help me and guide me as I seek to live according to His Word and His will for my life.

Warrior Sisters, Say that Again - May we speak the truth in love,
 full of grace and build each other up!