Slow Down and Show Up

I've spent time praying about my relationship with my children lately for many reasons.  I love both of them dearly and enjoy them, but was finding too many moments of not feeling a lot of joy too.  I realized I was often distracted by my own thoughts or to-do list and not fully present when with them.  I have asked God to reveal to me what might be in the way of me not being able to be present with them and enjoy them.  And of course, God listens to my prayers.  He provides answers although not always in the ways I might anticipate!

One of the major things I was already aware of was busyness.  Just. being. busy.  Too much going on!  So I have prayed against busyness.  I have asked God to unrush me and my life and to slow me down.  And I am seeing each day how He is doing that.  Of course some of it is up to me and the choices I make.  I have to use the word "no".  But He is creative and good.  

A few weeks ago, my youngest asked if I would walk to pick him up from school and I told him I would.  The first day I could have done this, I didn't because I was trying to do too many things before I picked him up and ran out of time.  I showed up in the car pick-up line.  He was clearly disappointed :(  I was convicted and decided I would make it more of a priority the next opportunity I had.  So, the next day I picked him up, I walked to the school.  He was delighted!  :)  The smile on his face was priceless!

We took our time walking home.   I asked him questions.   I took time to listen.  I was fully present with him.  It was beautiful.  I found great JOY in slowing down and looking at the leaves.  We stopped to step on them.  We stopped to take pictures of leaves and flowers.  We smelled things.  It was delightful.  He said he liked it a lot and wanted me to do it again.  When I asked what he liked about walking, he said "when we drive in the car, everything goes by fast.  When we walk, we slow down and look at all of God's beautiful creations."  Oh, how young ones often speak truth so clearly!

"10. Show Up - Most of us go through life half-present. But your child has only about 900 weeks of childhood with you before he leaves your home.  He'll be gone before you know it.  Try this as a practice:  When you're engaged with your child, just be right here, right now.  You won't be able to do it all the time.  But if you do it every day for a bit, you'll find yourself doing it more and more. Because you'll find it creates those moments with your child that make your heart melt."  - this was #10 from an article titled 10 Habits to Strengthen Your Relationship with Your Child on a parenting blog

I have been doing little things like this more since then and really enJOYing the moments.  I feel deeper connections with both of my children and I feel blessed.  Slowing down and showing up to be the mom I want to be is important for my children and for me.  I'm thankful that Father God does this for us too!  He is always ready to spend time with us, to listen to us, to share joy with us, to delight in us!  Thank you Jesus.

Say that again Warrior Sisters - slow down and show up and find the JOY in relationships!

Traveling and Light

I've been fortunate to do some traveling this summer.  In June I went to Alaska.  I have always dreamed of going to Alaska.  I had been praying for a long time about opportunities for my husband and I to serve together and also for God to show me how he wants to use me in our church.  My husband has been quite involved with the youth and we were both asked to assist in chaperoning the youth mission trip to Alaska.  I was very excited yet also felt some insecurities about going.  We have children and I am self-employed so being away for 10 days took some planning.  

I didn't know many of the youth that were going on the trip and I wondered how I would connect with them.  I don't consider myself "high maintenance" yet I am particular about some things...and I'm learning to let go about some of my particularities.  I wasn't sure I'd be ok with not doing my own cooking and choosing my food and then God had the youth director ask me to help plan the meals.  I don't mind not sleeping in my bed although after 9 nights of church floors and an occasional random couch, I was happy to come home to my bed again!  I love to camp and be outdoors so going a day or two without a shower isn't a big deal - good thing since we only showered 3 times in 10 days.  I like to wake early and have quiet time to start my day and most days God faithfully woke me up before the sleepy teenagers!  God provided many ways to connect with the kids through games, conversations, preparing meals, small groups, large group discussions and more.  He worked it all out!

God can do anything, you know—far more than you could ever imagine or guess or request in your wildest dreams! He does it not by pushing us around but by working within us, his Spirit deeply and gently within us.

 Ephesians 3:20-21 (The Message)

God has creative ways of answering prayers and helping us live out our dreams that are part of His will for our lives.  I never imagined that I would spend 10 days with a group of 4 adults and 26 teenagers with the opportunity to serve others in Alaska, driving around in 15 passenger vans taking in all the beauty of His amazing creation!  It was a blessing in so many ways.  I remain in awe at the beauty of His artwork - you can see a little in these pictures.

On a boat with our youth director/friend who planned the trip

Did I mention our trip was in June?  That means the days are very long in Alaska.  We had plenty of light to accomplish our service projects each day and to see the beauty around us.  There was daylight until after midnight!  We went to sleep in the light and woke in the light.

Jesus once again addressed them: "I am the world's Light. No one who follows me stumbles around in the darkness. I provide plenty of light to live in."

  John 8:12 (The Message)

Just last week we were able to get away as a family to the Oregon coast.  I love the ocean, the beach, jumping the waves, searching for seashells, exploring tide pools and building sand castles.  I love the sound of the crashing waves and how small I feel next to the enormous ocean.   I'm thankful for the time we had to play and relax and just get away.

My husband and I were both able to connect with old friends one day.  We met at a lighthouse and explored the nearby area and beach with our children and friends.  We even toured inside the lighthouse and heard about it's history.  It was very interesting and I thought about how many people's lives have been impacted and even saved by the light provided from the lighthouse.   I imagined being on a boat on the ocean in the dark or in a storm and how thankful I would be for the light to guide me back to shore and the safety of a harbor.  This led me to think about Jesus and how thankful I am that He is the light of the world and how He provides safety and refuge.  And that led me to think of one of my favorite verses which is from an old Amy Grant song, Thy Word...

Looking up into the Fresnel lens of the light - made of thousands of pieces and weighing 2 tons!

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path

Psalm 119:105 (KJV)

By your words I can see where I am going; they throw a beam of light

 on my dark path

Psalm 119:105 (The Message)

Warrior Sisters, say that again -- He is the light of the world and shines for all to see.  He is able to do immeasurably more than all we could ask or imagine.  Let's dream big!